Be as unclean as you want. Clean, unclean, it doesn’t matter! The Killer just wants to kill you. Although, maybe keeping an ear tuned to your surroundings when you’re making the Sweet Stuff with someone would be helpful. The lesson here: When you’re fiddling around, keep and eye on things.
All right. Settled. Good. Back to our movie: “Hide & Go Shriek”
Here we are in a location that never would have occurred to me: A large warehouse-like furniture store. Hmmm...good good. Show us where we can go, show us where it’s safe. And, show me where evil lurks. I need to know, we need to know.
Some hairful women and their tank-topped men spend a night at the store. I believe they’re supposed to be graduating high school although their friendship seems to revolve around the fact that they all graduated high school at age 23+. One of their dads owns the furniture store. They sneak in and spend the night. (Not the dads, the grads.)
After some light and fragrant sexual shenanigans, something very natural starts to happen. They begin to die. Pretty standard. Everyone dies. Except not everyone gets hacked up by a maniac who has something to do with (or could be) the ex-con maintenance man who lives in the basement.
These kids (sic) show us a whole new trouble. Fooling around is fun, sure, but...A giant empty furniture store?...I think this film sheds a little insight onto this, now doesn’t it? Ahhh...it’s good when you’re told things in no uncertain terms. It really helps. Because uncertainty can really muck you up. The folks in Hollywood know how to speak words of wisdom. This is why, when they don’t answer questions, I get so worried. As a reviewer, I’m pretty stymied. As a people, we are almost lost.
So, there are several couples (4) and quite a few of them are killed before the movie is over. Why? Who knows? They were there? Of course not...It’s never that easy. You know that! Be good! These poor dead kids are the examples for the rest of us. Someone needs to be sent to clear the path for others. Thank you, kids.
So, another quality piece from the boys and girls in celluloid. The almost total absence of plot makes things easier to see and absorb. They do it, they do it well.
You know what I think it’s time to do and I am serious...Donations. What better way to show your appreciation to these people who bring us so, so much! I have assembled a series of addresses. Just call my number at the paper (c/o the paper) and it will put you through to an automated message. The message will, basically, give you the rundown of all the major studios in Hollywood. A contact name is included with each. Send a check to that person “care of the studio” today. As much as you can. Come on, folks! Let’s give something back. They don’t make these movies for themselves. Give!
Give well!
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