Well, this is certainly a movie. Maybe not the movie to end all movies but definitely a movie. Let's stand in line, may we? They've got another one for us and it's this one!
The movie starts off with scenes of a summer camp, now closed down. We hear the sounds of kids playing but we see the place in shambles. This is Camp Arawak, closed for forever because something mysterious has killed everyone. Actually, it's only mysterious until the end of the movie, then you find out. But, the end's 85 minutes away and I'm here now.
Anyway, then we see a boat accident with a man and his two kids. One kid is killed and the man is killed in an also way. We then see the girl who survived. She's being raised, with her cousin, in her extremely stylized aunt's very stylized house. Then, the kids go to camp.
This is a camp that, from moment one, is completely fun & gay. The kids frolic around, the counselors frolic as well. The girl, whose dad and brother died, doesn't say a word. The cousin places fresh moves on assorted young ladies. A thin boy puts his movies on the quiet girl. There's a skinny dip with a whole lot of men. There's a counselor who (I forget his name) enjoys wearing the smaller and tighter things in shorts. So, everyone runs around and finds themselves and each other doing stuff people do at camp. And, the next thing I know (and they know) people start being extremely hurt or definitively killed.
The first person down is a burlym'n of dependent means who likes "baldies" (?, Savalas?) and who is the head chef. When he tries to help Angela (the quiet girl) get some food in the storage closet by taking off his pants, someone pours a huge pot of boiling water on him.
One of the boys is a jerk in a canoe with a girl at night and he is drowned. Another guy is stung by bees, a girl is stabbed in the shower, some little kids are axed up, a guy is decapitated, one girl is "curled" and other people die, too.
Oh for fun!
This is all presented in a very entertaining and light-on-its-feet fashion that keeps you coming back for more. At least until the movie ends.
The whole time there are all sorts of characters running about just trying to have fun until they die. There's the hot girl, the mean girl, the nerdy guy, the confused owner of the camp, the nice camp lady, the hateful girl and guy, Schlitz Mackilio and Wallace MacThumb. These people are such a rich, white tapestry that you'd think another film would be unnecessary. But, I see the moment that will carry on..
.
There is a strange feeling amongst the men in this movie. I don't know how to describe it but it sort of fingers around my brain and doesn't leave me much to say. We'll be enlightened. Also, I don't understand the aunt's house. It's not a house. Black walls and, in one scene, the two kids are in a bed and you can see their breath. I don't mean some sort of animatronic movie magic. I mean visible clouds of breath. Are they outside? Why? How? I thought I was the only kid growing up who had no heat in his bedroom and could see his breath in bed throughout the winter. (Don't worry, reader. I had a quilt.) Lastly, all the kids in this movie are kids. I don't know if this is a step forward or one back. (Was the old style where all the kids were in their 20's or 30's saying something important?) I'm a little confused by all this but I don't lie awake at night thinking about it. Very much. Let's hope someone can clear this up soon.
So, what have we got? More than we can handle I would think. Deep breaths. Sleepaway Camp is all that (All That You Know) and beyond. We'll get there in the end. We'll all get there. So, be careful. It's getting rocky and we don't turn back from here.
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